Through the Years

I have been putting together a DVD of pictures for McKenzie of her life. It has been interesting to see the hairstyles and fashions come and go and to see how fast she has grown up! Time really does fly especially when looking back. I thought it would be fun to post some of our family pictures as our family has grown.

1992

1994

1996

1998

1999

2003

Florida

We had a great time in Florida! McKenzie did great! She was 23rd out of 82 girls, most of the girls that did better than her were still club gymnasts and some had gymnastics scholarships. Kenzie was able to do a release move on the bars called a "pac" which she has not competed for almost 3 years and she did a back tuck, back tuck on the balance beam, again another skill that she has not competed for almost 3 years! It was a great ending to a long gymnastics life!
She had a great time with the other girls from Washington and had fun laying out at the beach and goofing off! She is out the door for her summer job in 11 days, time is flying by!
I also had a great time hanging out with my sister and laying on the beach and eating at Chick-fil- a since we do not have that here in Bellingham! She brought a book for me to read and I brought her a book to read, which was really cool since we did not mention this ahead of time, but we were on a race to make sure we had the books finished before the trip was over and we both succeeded! That is how lazy we were all week!

Only 12 days until Katie and I head off to Haiti!

Florida Highlights!

Some R & R

Tomorrow I will be lounging on this beach! Kenzie and I are heading out to St. Pete's FL for her final gymnastics meet of her life! While that is pretty significant, all I really care about is sitting on the beach or by the pool reading a book and hoping not to get too sunburned!
I am meeting my sister and my niece for some fun in the sun and gymnastics!

By the way, I got all of my laundry done in 2 days, just in case some of you were dying to know!

See you next week...I will be the one with the great tan! (more likely red and blistered)!

4 weeks!!

Last summer our washing machine broke, so we went and bought a new one. We bought the Whirlpool Duet front load washer and dryer( I had to have a matching set)! Well 4 weeks ago my 9 month old washer broke! Lucky for us it is still under warranty, so we called the repairman and he said he would be out in a couple of days. He came and ordered the broken part and said it would take a week to get it in. We ran to a friends house and did "emergency laundry" waiting for the part to come in. After 2 weeks the part arrived and the repairman came and put the part in and the washing machine is still broken. He said "Well there are only 2 parts that usually break so it must be the other part". So he orders the other part and guess what it has been over a week since he ordered the part and it is still not here.

Now there are 7 people living in our house and most of the people (the kids) like to wear their clothes one time and then they end up in the dirty clothes or all over the bedroom floor, so you can use your imagination as to what our dirty clothes pile is starting to look like after 4 weeks without a washing machine!!! Well, today Scott had had enough and decided that he was going to load up the washing machine and take it to Lowe's and demand a refund or a replacement!! About an hour later he comes back home and there in the back of his truck is our washing machine and a new washing machine!! I though 'that crazy man actually got them to give him a new washing machine!" Nope, he through his fit and they told him sorry that we had to wait until the part came in....so he bought the cheapest washing machine they had and hooked it up! We are now back in the laundry business. I will be in the laundry room all weekend instead of enjoying the beautiful sunshine we are having! Who knew that my kids had enough clean clothes to go a whole month without doing laundry?

Kelsie's Poem

We had a memorial today in honor of Ellie. We all wrote her a letter and planted a fushia tree by our front door in her memory. We sprinkled the dirt with goldfish and we will be making a marker and burying a copy of the letters and the goldfish package soon. Kelsie gave me permission to post her poem that she wrote to Ellie:

Brown
Brown, Brown, Brown, Brown
It is not a color
it is a beautiful little girl
It is the color of the precious baby
the sight of her is so shocking
as she is so adorable
her smile is not
one you can forget
because her teeth are oh so white
It is her big brown eyes
that stun you the most
the twinkle that you see
when she is so happy
It is her tiny hands that
grabs the goldfish crackers
off the silver mirror that portrays her golden face
It is the love that you see
when you look at her
at first it was confusion,
now it is love
every color, blue, pink, and green
looks good on her,
her hug is so warming
she sleeps so softly now,
she is happier then ever,
now that she is taken from this world
because she was too perfect.

by Kelsie

Thank You!!

Ellie Gordon 1-5-07 - 5-5-08

Thank you!!! I have been overwhelmed (in a good way) by the comments and the emails and the phone calls, flowers,CD, chocolate and pizza.

"In prosperity, our friends know us; in adversity, we know our friends."

I have truly come to know my friends and I appreciate all of you who have been praying for us, calling, posting, emailing, visiting, and serving us. I had the opportunity to teach a lesson on Sunday I foolishly chose the topic of adversity, I've had my fair share so I thought I could impart some of my wisdom. Little did I know that I would be drawn back to that lesson the very next day. Was it the Lord's way of preparing me? Maybe I should have taught a lesson on graciously receiving blessings and how to manage a life of ease! Some of us are asked to endure more adversity and trials than others, not that I have now cornered the market on adversity, I am sure there is more.

"Faith in something greater than ourselves enables us to do what we have said we'll do, to press forward when we are tired or hurt or afraid, to keep going when the challenge seems overwhelming and the course is entirely uncertain." GBH

When I read that quote today it had a new and different meaning than it did on Sunday. We have faith it is growing stronger! We will press forward even though we are tired, hurt and afraid, the course ahead is overwhelming and very uncertain. We will put our broken hearts out there again!

Through this adoption process we have met some very incredible people. One of them posted a blog today that expressed some of my thoughts as well. Even though Ellie already had a list of potential suitors little Malot definitely would have been one of her favorites I am sure. Her post is copied below. (Lori hope you don't mind I would have asked first but it is really late!)

RAGE

I miss Ellie.

I have to admit that I've had daydreams about Malot and Ellie falling in love some day in the future. They're such beautiful children and I could only imagine what their own children would look like.

I fancied that we'd be able to keep in touch with Ellie's family after we brought both kids home and that, through the years, love would blossom.

Ellie won't be coming home.

Why does this little girl have to be a statistic?

Haiti has the highest child mortality rate in this hemisphere. 1/3 of Haiti's children are severely malnourished.

And it is the politics that prevent these children from escaping the hell that kills them and coming to homes were they can get food, preventative health care, love, families, kisses, playtoys, clean water.

Ironically, for all the good it does to ensure that the world's children get the basics they need, UNICEF is the largest cause of the political delays we experience in international adoption. While they go on the record as supporting international adoption, the first thing they do when they move into a country is "encourage" the local government to keep their children in their country as a means of preparing for a better future. If you aren't familiar with UNICEF, that's the "humanitarian" end of the United Nations. The UN's peacekeepers have occupied Haiti for several years now. You know the old saying, "beggars can't be choosers". If you can't provide for your own it is very easy to be swayed by whomever will try to lead or help you.

One quick place to get information on what's going on in Haiti and a bit of the background on some of the issues that are experienced by international adoptions (particularly in Haiti in the more recent posts) is http://achildsvoiceinternational.blogspot.com/ . The slideshow in the link on her Sunday, May 4 post is particularly chilling. It was compiled by a charity called The Mercy and Sharing Foundation that is trying to help Haiti's children.

Thank you again to all of you who have been following our journey!

Tribute to Ellie Katina Jean Gordon

We love you and you will forever be in our hearts!

DEVASTATED

My emotions are pretty raw at this moment. We received the worst news that any family can receive! I got an e-mail from our adoption coordinator this afternoon and Ellie got sick and was taken to the hospital and she passed away this morning. We have all been crying, actually sobbing is a better word, for the past 3 hours. I was on the phone with a good friend and funny we were talking about the different trials that we go through and I was telling her that I am ready for a break, ready for the flat road for awhile when I opened my email and read the news I started sobbing and told her what happened then had to hang-up.
My heart hurts, that was my little princess, that is a child I knew I was meant to care for. I love her as much as I love any of my other children. How do we morn this loss? We didn't have the chance to say good-bye, we didn't get to tell her how much we love her. Did she even remember who we were? Did she think we came and loved her for a week then abandoned her? My children lost a sibling one that they had already made part of our family.
If you have been to my house you know that there is a picture of her in almost every room. Not a day, an hour, or a moment goes by that we did not think of her. How do we go on? Where do we go from here?
I have appreciated all the the prayers that have been said on behalf of our family please continue to pray for us, we are struggling, we are completely devastated!

Adoption Time Line

A lot of people ask me "When do you get to bring Ellie home?" That is the million dollar question I wish we knew, I wish there was a set date and time line. But there isn't! It could be 9 months to 3 years, that is a huge gap and that is very frustrating. Another mom outlined the process once the paperwork gets to Haiti and as you can see it is redundant and long but those are the hoops we must jump through before we can bring Ellie home! We are stuck on step 3 at this point trying to establish family history because her mom has disappeared!

Here are the steps:

1. Dossier arrives in Haiti at the orphanage/facilitator or lawyer's office. Adoptive parents should send 1 set of originals and 4 sets of copies of the entire dossier, including the French translations.

2. Any document that had to be authenticated by the Haitian Consulate in your country has to be taken to the Minister of Foreign Affairs for further legalization. They legalize the signature of the Haitian Consular Officer that legalized your dossier at the foreign Haitian Embassy in your country.

3. If the child to be adopted is already identified and/or as soon as the child is identified, the child's portion of the adoption dossier has to be compiled.

This dossier portion includes the social history on the child which is prepared by a Haitian Social Worker, a Psychologist report, a Medical report and a Lab Report is made. The social worker interviews the birth parents to not only get the family's history, but to also ensure that the birth parent understands what adoption is. For some cases this step can take a while because some families or mothers live out of the PAP area and travel is always challenging and can take a long time.

For the Psychological report, the child sees a psychologist who conducts different developmental testing with the child.

The Medical Report and Lab Report is basically a standard physical exam and all children are tested for HIV and other illnesses. Most orphanages also test the birth mother for HIV (though that test does not become part of the dossier).

Additionally, the child's birth certificate, parent's death certificate or relinquishment papers are added to the dossier at the time. Also, any birth or death certificates have to have Archive Papers (certification) attached to the document if the certificate is less than one year old. This certificate is called a "half-page" and certifies that the signature on the birth certificate and/or death certificate corresponds with the signature of the official who signed it.

If the birth or death certificate is more than one year old, then a "full-page" Archive has to be applied for at the Archive Office. This office types the information from the registry book onto a full page document. This "full-page" replaces the hand-written birth or death certificate.

Sometimes, obtaining a full-page Archive Document can take a long time. Most recently, the Archive Office has changed its stamp and is also using a computer instead of hand typing the documents. This new stamp is supposed to be "fraud proof". It is yellow in appearance on the paper. It replaced the old blue ink stamp.

4. When all the papers are back from Legalization and the Ministry of Foreign Affairs, and the child's paperwork is finished, the dossier is prepared for the National Office of Social Welfare (IBESR) and sent to the lawyer.

Some orphanages use a lawyer to put together the dossier for submission, others use their staff or facilitators to put the IBESR dossiers together. The dossier consists of one original document dossier and three copy dossiers.

5. Dossier is given to IBESR. The dossier has to get approval from three offices within the IBESR office.

*About 500+ dossiers from various countries (U.S., Canada, Spain, France, Netherlands, Belgium, etc.) are in IBESR at any one time.

6. Once the dossier is approved at IBESR, it must be studied and signed at the Parquet. That is where the actual adoption decree is issued.

Additionally, prior to that step, if the child has birth parents, they appear in front of a "Tribunal" - Justice of the Peace - to get counseled what adoption means and once the Justice of the Peace is satisfied that the birth parent is in agreement with the adoption and understands, he issues the "Minute de Graffe" (that is what it has been called, but I know that there is an offical term for it that I do not recall right now).

7. Courts (2nd Legalization) The adoption decree is legalized at Parquet. All the adoption documents are then sent to the Foreign Affairs Ministry for further legalization (legalizing the signatures from the court, etc.)

There are several steps that have to happen.- Attestation of the signature on the act of adoption. This is when Archives in Haiti says that the signature on the act of adoption corresponds with the signature of the judge who signed it. Just legalizing the signature.- Legalization at the Minister of Justice Office. Papers must be legalized here for all countries, saying that the signature is the legal signature of the Judges involved on ALL papers.- Legalization at the Minister of Foreign Affairs. Legalizing the signature of the Minister of Justice The dossier is picked up by the Lawyer.

8. Application for the child's Haitian Passport. The Orphanage representative submits a "mini" dossier that contains all the adopted child's and adoption documents to the Ministry of Immigration. From there, the dossier is sent to the Ministry of Interior (MOI).- Dossier goes to the Minister of Interior for study and approval.

This is the portion in the current process that had been very slow, but it is much faster now. The average wait for the MOI portion is about 4-5 months if there is an "issue" with a document (i.e. a mistake on the document where a new document has to be obtained) but if there is no "issue" with the dossier documents then the wait time is less than 30 days.

The orphanage representative has to come to MOI and provide additional information for a two-page form that has to be filled out and is kept on file at the MOI office.

A lot of information is copied from the dossier documents, but here is a summary of information needed from the adoptive parent:

1) 2 passport photos of each adoptive parent (single adopting parents need 4 photos) and a copy of a government I.D. card
2) Place of residence & telephone number
3) Name of employer, address, & telephone number
4) Profession
5) Religion
6) Social Security Number (or other number for non-U.S. adoptive parents)
7) Marital status
8) Reason for adopting.

Information about the birth parents:

1) Photo copy of the NIF card - they will copy the number onto the form
2) Name, birthdate, and marital status

Information about the adopted child:

1) 2 passport photos
2) Name, birth date, address
3) Health status
4) Schooling information

Inside of MOI, there are 3 steps, a lawyer studies the documents for authenticity and correctness, the "interview form", the approval letter issued to Immigration that a passport can be issued for the child.

The approved dossier is sent back to Immigration from MOI. The Orphanage submits some additional paperwork so that the the passport can get printed.

Process for U.S. Adopted Children:

9. Child is taken to have a Visa Medical Examination which is required as part of the visa application. Usually the medical exam has to be done after the passport is issued because the Embassy Doctor has to ensure that he/she is examining the child who is applying for the visa.

10. At the same time that the passport application is in the works, the U.S. Immigration process must be completed:
- Haitian adoption papers are translated into English, so that an I-600 can be filed in the United States or in Haiti if the adoptive parents come to Haiti.

- As soon as the family receives the I-600 approval in the mail from USCIS, the Orphanage needs to get a copy of it so that the U.S. Consulate can finalize the orphan investigation process, which is necessary for the granting of the child's visa that allows him to travel as an immigrant to the U.S.

(If the family participated in the Adjudication Orphan First Pilot Program, the orphan investigation has already taken place.)

Also, if the I-600 was applied for in the U.S. the U.S. Consulate Office is in charge of approving the I-604 ("orphan investigation").

If the I-600 was applied for in Haiti, the USCIS office is in charge of approving the I-604 ("orphan investigation").

Rumors are that the U.S. Consulate is going to be conducting all I-600 approvals and I-604 investigations whether the I-600 was applied for in Haiti or in the U.S.

11. The Orphanage submits the Visa Application with copies of certain documents to the U.S. Consulate. The U.S. Consulate reviews the completed dossier before approving the visa.

11. The adoptive parents' have their appointment in Haiti to receive the visa.

12. Get on the plane and go HOME with your child! :-)